June 21, 2009

The place we want to go for lunch isn’t open yet so we end up at a sushi place down the block from us. We sit out on the patio and we’re the only ones there and there are only the littlest flutters of movement inside. When the food comes we joke about the fish actually being small balls of lunch meat. Not a good meal.


After lunch we go to Guitar Center so Donald can get a mic stand and some other stuff. You pull in through a tunnel in the side of the building to get to the parking lot in the rear. A bulletin board in this tunnel is overgrown with fliers for bands.

Inside I am intimidated. I’m not buying anything so Dom and I are a waste of the air the sales associates use to ask us if we’re being helped. In the DJ section, an alien nest of stage lights and spinny things hangs from a grid on the ceiling, like the surreal section of a hardware store with all the ceiling fans and chandeliers hanging from the ceiling, except this hardware store is in Ibiza.

There are rockabilly pompadours like, outta control. I’m having a hard time coming up for a unifying stereotype for everyone in Guitar Center, except to say that if you stood up on an array of speakers and yelled, “I need six or seven people who would look believable playing behind Kid Rock, and I need them NOW,” you would not have any problems.

Dom and I fuck around on keyboards and the employees ask us if we’re being helped in an increasingly patronizing fashion. If they just went ahead and asked us to leave and stop wasting their time I would not be offended.

I imagine the female folk singer we saw at CityWalk the night before walking these aisles, pricing PA’s. I take a look in the guitar section and is clear to me that Guitar Center is a good place to bring your long-suffering girlfriend who is always two bad months away from giving up on you and your stupid dream.

Outside in the parking lot, we are passed by two guys in sunglasses who I think are in a band called “The Texting Boys.” Also in the parking lot, a sunburnt man wearing military garb over a Superman t-shirt is holding up an expensive camera and taking pictures of the sun. He, like The Texting Boys, is wearing sunglasses. Everyone is always wearing sunglasses. For ease of use, I think I will stop describing people as “wearing sunglasses.” From now on, when I describe a person, imagine they’re wearing sunglasses. A bumper sticker on the back of an old car says “Drum Machines Have No Soul.”


Later, the tiny British guy who lives in the penthouse (who we happened to be in the elevator with last week as he gave his companion an earful of anti-this-building-and-all-Americans sentiment) is in the elevator with me and Dom. I briefly consider expressing to Dominic how excited I am for 4th of July, but I settle for “See you guys later” as I get off at my floor and Dom goes up to the other apartment on the fifth floor. By “you guys” I meant all of our friends who live in this building, but Dom tells me later that the British guy was very visibly confused by this, and thought I was talking to him as well. This makes me happy.


That night we are going to see “The Hangover” at the Arclight, a fancy movie theater in Hollywood. I am excited for both the movie and the theater. The streets are teeming and crazy on this Saturday night and driving over on the radio we hear an ad for something called “One Hundred And One Audition Secrets Dot Com.” I remember this because during the ad it’s sung, a capella, no fewer than eight times. Then the female announcer says, “You only live once. This might be your only chance to be famous.”

We have a little time before the movie so we go to eat at a Baja Fresh across from the theater. I realize I’ve left my notebook in Donald’s car. It’s several floors up in a parking garage and I’m running short of notebooks anyway, so I decide to order my food and then go over to the Borders next door and get more. Baja is closing, though, so I have to use a back entrance that takes me through concrete shopping-center catacombs, and I don’t think I can get back in that way so once I’ve bought the notebooks I have to get my friends to let me in through Baja’s locked front entrance much to the understandable annoyance of the employees. We’re pushing movie-time and we take our food across the street and I bolt a burrito down in something like four bites so I will spend the entirety of the movie feeling like I have a zeppelin’s worth of super-heated air in my chest, and the whole thing was a rushed mistake on my part.

For a place that is supposedly so relaxed I have spent most of my time here in a hurried on-point stance of “Aw, wait, what? Shit, we gotta go.” I don’t blame Los Angeles so much as I am new here and I suck at it. Not to mention I felt that way most of my time in New York, it just seemed to be a place that was more in tune with high-strung neurotics who don’t leave themselves enough time for anything. It’s an energy I tote with me everywhere. I could never have a retreat to a charming Tuscan villa to get my groove back like in a chick-lit novel: the dark-haired free-spirited widow who by all rights should be teaching me to relax and let go as we stomp grapes and fall in love would put me back on a plane to the States after just a few weeks, begging the airline employee to find room for me on the next flight out before she, (in Italian), “puts a fucking shotgun in (her) mouth, I swear to God.”

The movie is playing in the Cinerama Dome, a theater with an enormous curved screen that was built in the sixties and is now part of the Arclight. It is a no-fooling movie palace, complete with big velvet curtains that open and shut and the whole deal. It’s very very cool and it makes me wish we were seeing a big “event” movie where things get smashed. Some things get smashed in “The Hangover,” but it’s not the sole purpose of the movie. There are some UCB people in the movie and it is neat to see them Cinerama-sized and killing it.


On the drive home, a guy dressed as Jesus is walking Sunset, giving people the Peace sign. Sade’s “Sweetest Taboo” plays on the radio.

Posted by DC at June 21, 2009 08:45 PM
Comments

I saw "Spartacus" at the Dome. It was even introduced by Kirk Douglas. I don't think I'll go back to the Dome until I figure the experience will top that.

Also, I recommend the Vista theater in Los Feliz/Silverlake. It's just one theater done up like the inside of the Well of Souls from Raiders of the Lost Ark. I saw Indy 4 there, which was cool, but the surroundings didn't save the movie.

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Wow. I'm surprised none of the employees at Guitar Center recognized Dom behind a keyboard.

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Do you guys ever cook or is going out to eat part of the "living in a new town" experience?

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